Category: Rants

Tweety tawt he taw a puddytat…

…but in fact it was a big-ass pickup truck with an even bigger ass inside of it who thought he could still make it through the traffic circle before the oncoming traffic. What makes him an ass is the fact that he did not include the car in front of him, the driver of which had already decided to yield to oncoming traffic, as both the law prescribed and a healthy sense of self-preservation dictated, in his calculations. Yellow Ford Ka after accidentOne would think a canary yellow car is easy to spot in traffic. Apparently it is invisible right until the moment you plough into it.

The wife, thankfully, is okay, though she spent most of the morning in tears from the shock and whiplash combined with scoliosis doesn’t help much.

I’ve already submitted a claim to the insurance, and I’m desperately hoping they don’t write it off (a strong possibility as the car is already ten years old and there’s damage to the actual body as well behind the cosmetic damage here) as we simply can’t afford to replace it, what with me still being unemployed and all. If you’re at all into praying, please pray that the insurance pays to fix it. Or the other guy’s company (as it was a company vehicle and apparently they don’t have insurance on their vehicles; I’m still waiting to hear back from them).

Yeah. I’ll stop now, as the rest of what I want to say isn’t suitable for publication…

On why I hate salespeople (and how to outsmart them)

I’m not talking of the nice sales assistants in shops who go check if they have this shoe in an eleven and three fifths when you ask them nicely. I’m talking of those guys who phone or knock on the door at the best of times and the worst of times, who waylay you in shopping malls like bandits of old, who latch on to you like a terrier and don’t let go until they get you to unwittingly exchange your soul for a set of steak knives, or a time share in Timbuktu, or a bottle of Antarctic air.

Dentists? Wonderful people. Lawyers? Salt of the Earth. Loan sharks*? Invite ’em over for tea. But salespeople? No thank you.

Continue reading “On why I hate salespeople (and how to outsmart them)”

On loud music at 6AM on a Sunday when I was planning to lie in

Sometimes I wish it were legal to whack people on the head with a hammer, like this morning when was woken at 6AM by loud techno music playing, apparently, in my bedroom.

This led to some momentary confusion. To start with, I don’t have a radio in my bedroom. On top of that, I don’t own any techno music and I never listen to it; in fact, it’s one of the very few music styles that I openly detest in its entirety.

Continue reading “On loud music at 6AM on a Sunday when I was planning to lie in”

On Inappropriate Adjectives (or why you shouldn’t call babies “sexy”)

Warning:  The following post contains potentially disturbing images.  Sensitive readers beware!

sexy:  1 (of a person) sexually attractive; 2 sexually exciting; 3 (of a person) sexually excited; 4 exciting and interesting.

~ The Oxford English Dictionary

Continue reading “On Inappropriate Adjectives (or why you shouldn’t call babies “sexy”)”

Some more getting right of facts

No, this isn’t another Dan Brown-inspired rant.  (Do tune in tomorrow for my review of Secrets of Inferno which explores the facts behind Mr Brown’s latest bestseller, though.)  Today I want to talk about something else.

I’m generally a nice guy (at least I think so), but I do have a nasty side and at times I can be a real bastard when I think someone is deserving.  What does one need to do in order to receive this dubious honour?  My dark side gets awakened when people indiscriminately forward e-mails. Continue reading “Some more getting right of facts”