Tag: babies

Houston, we have a tooth!

Houston, we have a tooth!

And I learned something important. Teeth release gas when they emerge. Methane, specifically. Copious amounts of the stuff. I mean, that little girl can clear a room at this stage. A ball room. I never thought I’d long for the days when the poo would stream out over my fingers in the middle of a diaper change…

But yes, over the weekend the first little incisor peeked its enamel-covered edge through those gums that have been aching and itching for weeks. We’ve only had a couple of glimpses – if we actually try to look Elizabeth clamps shut her mouth tighter than when I tried to adminiter those horrible antibiotics when she was sick. But it’s finally out, and every now and again I catch her exploring this new inhabitant of her mouth with her tongue. That’s when she’s not sticking anything else her hands can hold in her mouth.

I went to see my financial advisor today to set up a special savings account for the tooth fairy levies I’ll be obligated to start paying in about six years’ time. Six years don’t feel like that much, but what with inflation who knows what the going rate for a tooth will be in 2023? And kids have a lot of them, like over 20 or something!

The State of The Minion

The State of The Minion

A couple weeks ago our president delivered his State of the Nation address. It was sad. I’m not going to write about that.

I’ll much rather write about the State of The Minion. Squishy is called The Minion now. First, because she’s becoming less squishy every day, and second because she speaks fluent Minion. And third, I’ve decided to pursue a career in arch-villainy, and given the quality of minions available on the open market these days, one can’t start training them early enough. If she’s to inherit my evil empire one day, the sooner she starts learning the family business, the better. Haha! HaHaHa!!! BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

What was I talking about again? Oh, yes. The Minion.

Continue reading “The State of The Minion”